Barely Breathing
by Writer Charmante
Summary: Remus Lupin reflects on the day that he lost the girl that he loved.


**Barely Breathing**

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing in the Harry Potter Universe. J.K Rowling does. Ha, just try and sue me now.

**A/N: **I wrote this for a contest.

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Have you ever received a hard blow to the stomach? I have. It knocks the wind right out of you, leaving your chest aching and your throat dry. You feel like you'll never breathe again. The only thing that I can compare to that experience is the day that I saw Lily Evans kiss James Potter, and I'll tell you, I still don't think I'm breathing. She left me hanging there, gasping for breath, as I lost her, the girl that was my soul, to my best friend.

And how cliché it sounds. It's just like the movies. Although I grew up in the wizarding world, I still have seen quite a few muggle films in my whole seventeen years of life, enough even to call myself a movie buff. You see, this is how it happens in the movies. The good guy finally thinks that he's won the heart of the girl, the beautiful, smart, strong, loving girl. That would be too easy though, right? The bad boy has to come in, with his dashing good looks, bright smile, and spontaneous ways, and steal the girl away by showing her adventure like she's never known. That's just how it is in the movies. You'd think a situation like that would stay in a fictional world, but no, it can happen in real life, too. I know that all too well.

I can give you the date that it happened, if you really must know. It was May 27th, and the first signs of summer were really starting to show. You know, the sun was excruciatingly bright, the weather was unbearably hot, and Sirius was trying to rope a few 5th year girls into going skinny-dipping with him in the lake. Nothing unusual, or so I thought. I was with Peter, leaning against the trunk of the tree where we all usually sat on days like those. The branches were big and wide, and it created a lot of shade to protect you from the blazing hot sun. We were studying for the History of Magic exam, which shockingly, was getting rather boring. No, wait a second now, last I checked History of Magic is always boring, but moving on, I decided then to take a break.

It felt good to finally stand up and stretch my legs, as I had been sitting beneath the tree for quite some time. At that point, Sirius was still trying to persuade Rosemarie Engle to have a dip in the lake with him, and it seemed to have worked, but only after Sirius had taken off his shirt. This was so typical of girls to act this way towards Sirius that I shrugged it off. It didn't matter that most of the girls at Hogwarts were flighty little dunderheads, because there was one girl that I knew was better than all the rest.

She was beautiful, with a smile that could change my day around in an instant. She had the most gorgeous red curls that I had ever seen. Her hair wasn't flaming red, like a girl named Molly Prewett who had finished Hogwarts a few years ago, but a deep auburn. It went especially well with her breathtaking green almond-shaped eyes. Those eyes were the most captivating things that I had ever beheld in my entire life. They had the power to entrance you, and I swear when we talked she would just have me hypnotized by them. Even more importantly, they reflected her every emotion. Joy, sadness, annoyance, anger, and even love could be seen reflecting in those beautiful emerald orbs.

I had decided to go and sit a little closer to the lake that day, figuring that a some sun might liven up my appearance a bit. After all, it was about three days until the full moon, and to be honest, I really was not looking my best. I was laying on my back in the grass, the fresh smell ensnaring my senses while the warmth from the sun lulled me to sleep. I was on the brink of unconsciousness when I heard a giggle to my left, a giggle that sounded distinctively like the one belonging to a certain Miss Evans. I rolled over on one side, and I'm certain my jaw must have practically dropped to the ground at the sight that was before me.

Lily Evans had just put her arms around James Potter's neck. He had his hands on her waist, and she was leaning in, whispering something in his ear. Then, she brought her head back, and stared into his eyes. I mean, stared, too. Even from my position on the ground, I could see the warm twinkle in her eyes that could only mean happiness. I needed to get a closer look.

I stood up, rubbing my eyes. I thought that perhaps the sun had blinded me temporarily and I wasn't seeing correctly. I thought that maybe I actually was sleeping and having a nightmare. Then I concluded that because it was so hot out that the vision of Lily and James before me was, in fact, a mirage. Then she put her hand on his cheek. I really hadn't been dreaming…

Lily was playing with the hairs at the nape of his neck. I really couldn't believe it. I felt my breaths become shorter, the air I was taking in was barely filling my lungs. Then she kissed him, and I felt the wind get knocked out of me.

Being a boy of seventeen, I have spent a large majority of my life rough-housing with other young boys. When you're wrestling and horsing around, as young boys do, many things can happen. There's bloody noses, black eyes, and in extreme cases, even broken bones, but nothing will ever hurt more than a hard blow to the stomach. It's the ache that takes the longest to recover from, as you slowly regain your breath. It's been a year since Lily Evans kissed James Potter, and I'm still just barely breathing. 


End file.
